May 24, 2011

Jesus and Me-Removing Evil

As I have been spending this month in prayer and time with Jesus, I have been learning that truly there is power in words.  The words that a friend spoke to me not only hurt me in that moment that they were spoken, but they have clung to me and have oppressed me.  I began to see that the words were not only mean, but injurious to my very spirit.  

The words began to torment me and cause a great sadness to fill my heart.  All of this I brought before God.  I humbled myself under His hand and asked Him to reveal anything in me that needed to be confessed; anything that was sin in His eyes regarding the way I had conducted myself within this friendship.  He brought no charges against me, but has showed me that I only spoke what He had shown me.

It is definitely hard to do the right thing.  Sometimes it can bring injury to your very spirit.  
Last night as I was coming home from a prayer class I am taking at my church, my girlfriend said she could not only see the oppression I have been under, but she could actually feel it.  She began to speak wisdom to me, to pour confidence back into my heart.  She prayed over me release.  Something I hadn't prayed for for myself, but agreed that it is time.  I have spent enough of myself, perhaps more than was asked of me in holding this injurious friend up.  Instead of cursing, I chose to bless her in my heart and in my prayers.  Though I had a growing fear of her rising over me, which I guess I was unaware.

However, it began to consume me and my heart became heavier and heavier under the burden.  I do think it is good to have your heart broken for the things that break God's heart, but there is also a time to remove yourself from evil (things that are hurtful, and injurious to your being).  

God led me to Psalm 37 this morning, as Jesus beckoned me out of bed to spend time with him. 
I have a new understanding of this verse:

27  Depart from evil, and do good, and dwell for evermore

Depart (from Noah Webster 1828 dictionary) : to go or move from, to separate from, to remove

Evilhaving bad qualities of a natural kind, qualities that lead to injury, that which brings sorrow or calamity or loss, that which disturbs your peace, which impairs happiness, and destroys perfection of natural beings.  That which brings pain or distress.

It is clearly time to let go.  Time to move forward and not to carry the baggage any longer.  The words she had spoken became an oppression to my spirit.  Perhaps even a spirit was attached to those harmful words spoken to me, that last night I suddenly became aware of in my tears.  I realized that beyond the pain, that I could feel a spirit of oppression sitting on me.

  Quickly I commanded it to go- with the authority I have been given in Christ.  I am covered not only by my loving God and Savior, but by my true friends.  

I am seeking God for His wisdom, for strength and for Him to help me not walk in fear (worry, fret, anxiety) in this situation, but to now walk in courage and in boldness in it.  

Courage is a decision...
boldness begins in the heart and flows out into our actions. 

Courage is knowing who our confidence is in, 
boldness is executing that courage from within to without (how we choose to live and be).
In courage and in boldness (from Him) comes freedom.  
 Certainly it gives a liberty from oppression caused by evil.

I am living my life to please Him, I am walking forward in a new strength, with hope, courage and expectation that He is not only the keeper of my head, heart, soul and spirit; but also that He is giving me peace from that which has been controlling me this past year.


We Are Family said...

I can relate to this post. I had a 'toxic' friend. The Lord clearly spoke to me to break off the relationship. I was hesitant. I obeyed. When I spoke truth in love,she lashed out at me. It was awful. Long story short. The Lord took care of it. I have seen her since and there is nothing but peace between us. The Lord is at work. He is good :0)

Renata said...

Thank you for sharing dear Kimmie. I've also been struggling this last couple of months with a dark depression (& I'm usually a glass - half- full person). It was only once I realized that there was more to it than just me & I asked God to take away what was bothering me that it's gone - completely - Praise the Lord. Sure the underlying issue is still there, but I'm trusting the Lord on that one.
Please know that I've found this post encouraging - thank you for sharing

Stacy said...

I love you.

and I think you're amazing.


That's all.


Anonymous said...

Oh what joy to live in peace with God through Jesus Christ our Lord. He truly can walk on the water, bind up the brokenhearted, and give peace that passeth all understanding.

I have been afflicted in this way many, many times throughout my life. I realize that my Mother was afflicted in this manner too, and passed it on to me. These spirits are hideous. Thank you for sharing, because we all think that we are the only ones. Praise the name of Jesus aloud, as it makes the demons tremble.

Jesus is the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. His name is above all names. Praise to the one and only God our Father for His mercy and deliverance!

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