Jul 12, 2010

The End of a New Day


The baby woke up crying, several hours after her bedtime.  Our 13 year old Ethiopian came downstairs rubbing her eyes, telling us she was crying.  We hadn't heard her, but her loving sister had and came to tell us we were needed.

My Knight made our Baby Mercy, some juice in a sippy cup and also brewed her a cup of tea with honey.  As we sat in the dark living room, sipping her beverage of choice, she confiscated her Papa's flashlight.  She turned it on with help and played happily in the dark, her breathing slightly labored, but captivated by the soft glow of the flashlight.

She eventually drifted my way and skooched her hand up to look at my belly button.  She was giggling as she studied it.  It made me think of the years of my infertility treatments.  It brought back memories of laparoscopies and all the poking I endured for a decade in hopes of pregnancy that never came. 

Tonight a tiny brown hand poked at my scars and pondered my belly button with her dim little light.  Funny, but suddenly a light went on in my spirit that I never knew was there, a light of understanding that all of that infertility treatment and its failures, brought me to one of the greatest successes of my life-my sweet Ethiopian daughter Mihret.

Thank you God for giving me infertility.  Thank you for calling me to adoption, even prior to finding out that I had secondary infertility.  Thank you for giving me the answers to my prayers in the 8 beautiful children that call me Mama.

I'm going to bed, not sure if it will be for the night, as the baby is sick...but now that the light is on deep within in that hurting place that often I hide; I think sleep, however long, will be sweet indeed.

4 comments:

mom said...

I'm sad that your sweet baby is still not feeling well and that you have a *bug* in your house, BUT how wonderfully God has used this to heal your heart a bit more! {{{Kimmie}}} Hope you get a few winks of sleep!

Blessings,
Tammy ~@~

"Indescribable" said...

Amen! A true gift to actually be able to see why some things are they way they are. Hope the bug is escorted to the door soon!

Valerie said...

First of all, that picture is one of the sweetest pictures ever. :)
Second, you brought me to instant tears when you thanked God for your infertility. Kimmie you are such a blessing to me. I'm reminded of the childrens song "this little light of mine" cause girl, you SHINE His light. It is beautiful.

Renata said...

This is so beautiful & it's brought me to tears - I can imagine what it was like when you went through all the treatments & Praise God now you have such a beautiful family. Thanks for sharing.
Renata:)

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